The scene: my Paladin is running around turning in quests. Had to run to Moonglade for the first time to turn in the quest from the end of Mauradon. Which means going through Timermaw Hold. But, you now I didn’t feel like doing the rep grind to neutral, so I’m just going to run it.
… Along the way, I draw some furbolgs, and kill a couple. I just notice rep changes.
Me: “Oooh, cool, I can just kill my way through to neutral.”
At this time, I should mention, Atropus is hanging around, and we’re waiting for other people to show up.
Me: “OH WAIT. The rep is going DOWN.”
… What? It’s a form of diplomacy!
Or, why mining in Icecrown is hazardous to me. If this had happened once, it’d just be sad or funny. As it’s happened several times, it’s… well, it’s something.
*Math flies around Icecrown with Track Minerals on, finds a ping*
“Oooh, look, Rich Saronite! Hrm, this is right on a ledge, and this is obnoxious.”
*maneuvers his drake, lands precariously, often on top of the node itself, and tinks away, smashing Azeroth in the face and picking up the delicious loose change it drops*
“Bwee, ore and primals and gems oh my! It’s like a rock pinata!”
*finishes, starts moving onward*
“I’m still on foot. I’m going to fall.”
“*stops* Oh! Right. Yeah. I forgot to mount up. Okay. *mounts*”
*resumes moving, running forward and jumping off, wheeee! I <3 BASE jumping in WoW!*
“This is the Wintersaber, not the drake.”
“Self, Wintersabers are ground mounts.”
“Yes, yes they are.”
“That means they can’t fly.”
“…Falling is a form of flying!”
“… Er, I don’t th-”
GROUND CRITS MATH FOR HEALTH BAR (CRUSHING)
“Self, what did we learn?”
“Based on this being the sixth time that this has happened, nothing.”
“Sometimes, I think I hate you.”
And yet, sometimes, it happens anyway. This is the story of how my life got flipped turned upside down I found that, you can do oh so good for so long, but, like darkness, huntardation always comes.
“Hey, let’s run Utgarde Pinnacle for achievements and try to get the blue drake! Besides, they now drop Conquest emblems!”
(…yeah, this is an older story, and despite being ancient and dusty news, it has yet to be lived down.)
Group forms up from guild, Quin, our illustrious healer and charm against death, who did the dubbing, was healing. I forget who the rest were – it doesn’t matter, they were still witnesses. Cleave through trash like they crossed our enrage timer, and get to Svala Sorrowgrave in short order. Quin, it bears noting, has a litte goose (affliction warlock, or “afflock”) alt.
We show Svala that being reborn in hot, frosty undead valkyrie glory is no good if a group of plucky, overgeared raiders are right there to clip your wings. It ends with her last Ritual of the Sword phase on me, and the sword is ticking down.
Do I move? No. I keep DPSing her.
Svala dies. Do I move THEN? Nah – she’s so dead (‘how dead is she?’), she won’t be alive when the countdown ends.
And what do you know? She dies before I do!
The boss fight is over! The danger is over! Loot is being distributed!
This is what happens next, in very quick succession and short order:
Mathorvos: *attends to loot*
Sword: *FALLS ON MATHORVOS’ HEAD, ROFFLESTOMPS*
Whole run: “WTF JUST HAPPENED?”
So, yeeeeaaaah. When you kill Svala, the sword doesn’t go away. It keeps falling. And if you’re dumb, or oblivious, enough to keep standing under it, it’s going to go STABBY STABBY WHEE all over your face.
You know who else stands under swords instead of moving? Pets. Because they don’t have the AI for it.
…And this, folks, is why, to this day, I’m still occasionally refered to as “Warlock Pet.”